Something I believe in doing often is bathing in your own blood, metaphorically. What decisions are you making, where are you in your self-healing process and what energies are you putting out? This adult evaluation can sometimes be interrupted by inner children (or feelings) which are dying to be expressed outwardly. They act in certain ways because they do not feel comforted or soothed because as an adult we have not figured out how to do this yet with certain inner children (or how to take care of certain feelings).
The below is a channeled message that came about after a maddening night in which I sat with Persephone in deep contemplation and meditation to understand myself, my decisions, and anything I have or haven’t done in the past. Persephone has been walking with me since October 2, and blood has been a major theme for me ever since. One decision in particular that I made recently had me bleeding almost directly from the third eye, where I had gotten a piercing right below and it was in the process of healing but I was crying so hard that the wound bled profusely down my face.
“My adult self made an adult decision, but my whole body and emotions (anxiety) are in an uproar. Those are your (abandoned) inner children, there are two here now. Try picturing yourself picking one of them up with your right arm and holding them at your hip, while embracing the other with your left arm, as they hug your left thigh. Your inner children need comfort from your inner parent, that’s all they’re looking for. They want to be able to look you in the eyes and say but I want that now! Please! Now! While they cry hysterically. They want your love and attention, they want you to hold these feelings for them (this is the true definition of holding space for yourself), after all they are a part of you too. If you can really do this, they will calm down. This might not happen immediately but you have to maybe go distract yourself(1) with something else for about an hour, get out of your head away from the body and emotions, then come back and they will still be yelling and screaming but you can look at them now more objectively since you stepped away and say with complete certainty I know those are my kids. They’re not me, they’re my kids and my kids need tending to right now. It’s very important that you separate yourself from them while you are handling them because if you can do that being able to do that is what managing them is all about. With managing them (or the feelings) comes merging them to become at peace and one with you. To not show up so violently and so disruptively, but to become manageable. Before you get there though, for now, you show them deep compassion, and they will soon be fast asleep on your shoulder and leg and everything you felt will start to dissipate. The more times you do this the more they trust you and also SEE that they can trust you. They experience trusting you because you give them that experience by paying attention, this is how they become manageable. Because if you are freaking out with them, then they don’t trust you to handle the situation. All three of you are running in circles flipping out and crying then nothing gets accomplished.
Important: if you feel them come on but you can’t immediately do the above because you’re busy brushing your teeth or cleaning up then imagine a third party—like a babysitter-esque person who’s warm and welcoming in their demeanor—taking care of them. Trust that because you created this person, they intuitively will know that you are coming soon to tend to the children because the point is you’re having SOMEONE give them attention albeit temporarily. When you ignore them or just outright become them because you’re hysterical too, then nothing will change. But if you can tend to them, you just have to tend to them, and you will see, they will calm down. I personally imagine a woman named Martha who’s very gentle to the touch and has a soothing voice like someone’s grandmother.”
What was also said to me was, make a talisman, or a touchstone of some kind to interact with those parts of you rather quickly, if you are say in a meeting or at a family dinner where you cannot rage outwardly or be with yourself. Carry the talisman with you at all times so you can tap in if need be.
(1) Read about how temporarily distracting yourself from intense emotions, disturbing thoughts, or feelings of pain is a healthy coping mechanism here.
Jennifer Diane is a witch scholar, writer and model based out of New Jersey. She’s authored Folk Horror, Rural Horror, Devil’s Manifesto, Emotional Horrorshow, and Salvation. Book a one on one session, shop her books and zines, or find her on Instagram.
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